Monday, December 26, 2011

Resolutions vs. Themes: Where they came from…

Part of our goal at Sweet Spot Skirts, is to make daily life just a little bit more fun!  I have always hated New Years Resolutions… maybe because everybody else does it, but I am usually quite conforming.  Maybe it is a fear or failure… if I start something on a certain day the idea that I have to follow through with it daily for 364 days…may prove to be just too much for a perfectionistic almost OCD, over achiever.  Life is too good to just monotonously walk through, same day different time, same stuff going on.  Many of us get caught up with husbands, partners, dogs, cats, kids, work, JOBs, housecleaning and forget to take care of ourselves.  Life happens! 

In 2005, I had a divorce.  Good or bad it happened and I was devastated.  It took hours of counseling, lots of tears, and whole bunch of self analysis before I recouped.  In this process, I began to theme my years.  I would pick something to focus on for the entire year.  If it was a bad day … I focused on my theme.  That way failure was not an option, as it would be with a resolution that you “can’t break” vs. a theme that was just always there.  Besides coffee, sometimes the thought of my theme was the only thing to help me get out of bed and face the day.  If you want to understand how themes can make life fun and help you out of a difficult situation, please read the following! 

2006:  Pray Hard. Sometime when you are at life’s bottom barrel, praying is the only thing that makes you feel close to God and accepted.  I stumbled upon a ring in the Christian Book Store that was $12.95 and had the words PRAY HARD stamped in Black on a silver band.  I bought it and every time I looked at those words it made me remember I wasn’t alone and I was loved. 

2007:  Truth.  I had a year of counseling under my belt and I was on my soap box preaching the truth to anyone who would listen.  Truth about men, divorce, marriage, lies, addiction, life, ect.  I felt that when you knew the truth it would set  you free.  Looking back, knowing the truth was one thing but dealing with the truth would be another 4 year process.  Truth was defined like this:  “When you know what you know.”  I went back to that same Christian Bookstore and sure enough they had another ring with the letters TRUTH stamped in black on a sliver band…so I bought it, wore it everyday….I guess you could say the truth did set me free.  When I looked at those words it reminded me I have a voice, I have a brain and I can see through to the truth in life…it was very freeing.

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2008:  Simplify. With a few years of counseling completed, I felt it was time to take the focus off of my divorce and look at my life.  Cluttered and scattered and bulging at every seam, would be an accurate description.  I decided my life was about to get a bunch simpler.  23 bags to goodwill, 4 to dress for success and I moved into a one of my rentals that was too small to command enough rent to cash flow…  1100 sq. ft.  Perfect for a year of simplify. To commemorate my year, I decided to take all of my diamonds that I had collected over the 40 some years of life.  They were being stored in a shoe box in my garage.  My moms wedding ring, my dad’s wedding ring, the blue sapphires from my grandmother, the Yogo sapphire from my very first real boyfriend.  We removed all the stones and made one “life” ring using all the diamonds.  When you look at the picture, you can’t notice it, but every single diamond was a different size.  My jeweler Rand, is incredible.  I simplified 41 pieces of jewelry that I never wore… into one wonderful ring that I wear every day!  When I look at that ring I it reminds me that I am loved and that a simple life is a good life!

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2009:  Minimal.  Following the year of simplify I wanted to make sure and not re-clutter my wonderful simplified life.  I didn’t buy a thing.  I had 24 hour rules, no shopping at Nordstrom, borrow if you can and I really developed a sense of diligence about my spending life.  Each year, I like to have the next theme chosen before the Holidays.  That way it isn’t rushed.  December 20, 2008 my father died in his sleep in Arizona, the neighbor hadn’t seen him in days, the police broke in and “that” phone call came.  Trauma abound.  We were in the middle of  repairing a broken childhood relationship and I had purchased him a home so he could live out his last years of life (at the time I figured another 15 or 20 years) in peace and happiness. The shock and horror that followed were debilitating.  Long story short, he had $500 dollars in his pocket when he died.  I fished the money from his pants pocket and after much thought went to Tiffany’s.  I bought the least expensive ring from Tiffany’s and gave kudo’s to my father, who I am sure was thinking of doing the same thing for his precious little daughter.  Yes a bit fairytale ‘ish’ but healing and meaningful at the same time.  So, there you have it a ring that is minimal by Tiffany’s standards and made me feel like a princess.  All year I wore that ring and it reminded me I was loved by my father and oh that is right…. DON’T buy it if you don’t need it!!!!

tiffany ring

2010:  Sweet Spot.  This was the year of the Sweet Spot!  I created the idea of a Sweet Spot Skirt in September of 2009 and by the beginning of 2010 we had product.  March 1, 2010 we formed an LLC and never looked back!  Remaining true to the symbol of my themes, I contacted my jeweler to see what could happen for this year’s theme of Sweet Spot.  We had a bunch of stones left over from my year of simplify and he put them together in a matching ring and necklace to commemorate my first entrepreneurial adventure:  Sweet Spot Skirts.  The year went great and everybody still to this day comments on the set.  It is a great conversation starter and has actually sold some skirts! 

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2011:  Surrender.  This year was the best.  I completely let go of most control.  Which for an old narcissistic, control freak baby boomer was not easy.    I have tried all year to let people be people.  To take great pride in hiring good people and let them be their best.  Don’t get me wrong I still work very very hard and I still guide people through things when needed.  I just really don’t care about what I can’t control.  If you want to be mean… then be mean.  If you want to be rude…. be rude.  People can only be who they are not who you want them to be.  Including men.  ha ha  I can’t tell you if it was a huge success, but sometime when you try and control everything it is exhausting and….I have not felt exhausted this year… so progress has been made!  Are you wondering what jewelry commemorates this year?  I have been hanging on to a ring that my ex-husband gave me twice.  Yes, twice.  He wasn’t a very good giver and made me feel so bad about the expenditure we took it back.  Then I complained about it so much, he went and bought it again.  Needless to say,  while it was a super beautiful ring, it had a very negative and forced feeling when I wore it.  I gave this ring to my jeweler and said, ”Rand I trust your ability and will let you make what ever you want with these diamonds.”  I gave complete control and surrendered the outcome.  You can see what he made and I wear it every day.  It reminds me to let go and let God… to stop controlling those around you and see how awesome life can get!

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2012:  Release your Inner Warrior!  This is a double theme… we themed Sweet Spot Skirts and my personal life with this wonderful statement.  I look forward to input from women around the world as we meet and talk to them during our events and sales.  For me personally, I am doing the Warrior Dash on September 8.  I will have a fabulous warrior skirt that will be available later this year.  Meanwhile, I  am busy writing the thoughts I have for the Year 2012:  Release Your Inner Warrior!  So far my reminder token has always been a ring or a taken apart ring…. not sure how to commemorate this year! 

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Happy New Year to all!  I hope whether themed or not that “twenty-twelve” is a great year for you and your family!

Stephanie

3 comments:

  1. I *love* what you've done with your jewelry over the years! Such wonderful, amazing stories.

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  2. what a great read, thanks for sharing.

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  3. You are an amazing woman my friend!!! And I am so thankful to call you my friend. What a fun year 2011 was. So looking forward to 2012 and the exciting adventures it will bring to Sweet Spot Skirts. Release that Inner Warrior!

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